women do it all. Nerida Kiprotich is
Australian, her husband Thomas is
from Kenya, and together they have
a 21-month-old son and a second
baby due in March. Nerida says,
Traditionally in Kenya, men do
not help with childcare, housework,
cooking, etc. Fortunately, Thomas has
been living away from Kenya since
2006,
so he is more open-minded
about these things.”
Finding common ground
For some of the couples I spoke to,
Hong Kong is a third culture – a
My husband, on the other hand, is
isolated and misses his home country.
This loneliness is further compounded
by his role as the stay-at-home parent.
He also deals with prejudice regularly
and many people have been very rude
to him.”
Fortunately, other couples have
had more positive experiences. Glenn
Douglas, from New Zealand, has been
living in Hong Kong for several years
now. He met his Indonesian-Chinese
wife Kendri when they were both
working in the aviation industry. They
have been married for six months,
maybe sheds a little understanding on
the difference culturally.”
Charlotte describes Hong Kong
as “neutral ground”. She says, “We
like Hong Kong – it’s not his home
country, and it’s not mine, yet English
is spoken well enough here that I
can feel comfortable. Hong Kong is
actually perfect for us. It helps to have
a neutral ground where neither one of
you feels pressured to conform to one
set of values.”
Beth Chakravorty, originally
from the United States, is married
to Prachish. Prachish’s parents are
Indian, but he grew up in Hong Kong.
Despite the cultural trend for arranged
marriages, Prachish was “determined
to find his own way” and met Beth
here in Hong Kong. She agrees with
Charlotte and says that living in Hong
Kong has helped alleviate some of
the problems that can arise in an
interracial or intercultural marriage.
I’ve actually found it easier living
with a third culture in Hong Kong. It
helps to balance things out – a little
distance from our families allows us
to create our own traditions yet enjoy
our respective family traditions when
we can. Both sides of the family get
relatively equal time with us, so it
levels out the playing field.”
For Nerida and Thomas, life
in Hong Kong has had unexpected
benefits for both of them. “Because
We like Hong Kong – it’s not his home
country, and it’s not mine, yet English
is spoken well enough here that I can
feel comfortable. Hong Kong is actually
perfect for us.
new home where it doesn’t matter
where they each started out. But
this too can add more challenges to
the relationship. For Siobhan and
Piseth, “Living in Hong Kong has
been harder for my husband. There
are very few Khmer people living in
Hong Kong and he gets quite lonely.
I have many Australian friends and
can speak English with lots of people.
and Glenn says, “I have found living
in Hong Kong a breeze, especially
having married into its culture.
Besides the obvious benefits of having
a translator on call, conversations with
Kendri can sometimes alleviate my
frustrations’ as to why the local people
do what they do. This understanding
doesn’t necessarily make you accept or
agree with a particular frustration, but
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