of living in Hong Kong, and Thomas
being well-known here as one of Hong
Kong’s top runners, he was able to set
up his own business. That’s allowed
us to help family in Kenya that we
wouldn’t have been able to, and
also help Kenyan runners join races
throughout Asia.”
Making it work
Most of the couples agree that the
ability to communicate, accepting
each other’s differences, and finding
common ground are all key to making
their relationships work. Amelia says,
“
In order to make it work, I feel like I
have to try harder for things that other
couples may take for granted. For
example, sharing a random memory
from your childhood: Our childhoods
were so different that we cannot relate
to one another on that level. You have
to be accepting and live life with an
open heart and mind.”
different, our family backgrounds
are not so different. We both come
from close-knit families with strong
mothers. We have similar values: we
both value education, tolerance and
hard work.”
Beth agrees, and says, “As with
any couple, interracial or not, I think
the key is to make sure you’re on
the same page before dealing with
any challenges. We may not always
agree, but we find a common ground
and approach the issue together. We
always support each other.”
When it comes to tradition it can
be difficult to give up things that have
been important to you your whole
another culture, there are also many
advantages. Learning about another
culture is perhaps the biggest one, and
each couple credits their partner with
teaching them to be more accepting
and open-minded. Siobhan says,
“
It’s so interesting! We learn a lot
from each other, especially patience,
understanding and acceptance. He
has done some amazing things in
his life and I love to hear stories
about when he was growing up in his
village. Our children have exposure
to different languages and cultures
at home as well as outside. And my
husband makes an awesome green
curry paste from scratch!”
life, and this is a challenge couples
face when they have very different
cultural backgrounds. Amelia has
found a compromise that works
for her family for the time being,
in regards to holidays. She says,
“
Unfortunately, because my husband’s
family is Buddhist, they don’t celebrate
Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving,
or any of the holidays that I would
traditionally celebrate. He didn’t grow
up celebrating the holidays that I
did, so he doesn’t have any emotional
connection to them. So I go back to
Toronto with my son for Christmas
and New Year’s, and we do a whole
family gathering in Hong Kong for all
the Chinese holidays.”
Despite the challenges that can
come with marrying someone from
As with any couple,
interracial or not, I
think the key is to
make sure you’re
on the same page
before dealing with
any challenges. We
may not always
agree, but we find
a common ground
and approach the
issue together. We
always support
each other.
Siobhan believes that, despite
their differences, it’s the similarities
that make their marriage work:
“
We both have the well-being of
our children as our main goal. Even
if we do things differently, we’re
still working towards a common
goal. Accepting and appreciating
our differences serves to make our
relationship stronger. Although
our cultural backgrounds are quite
Glenn believes that marrying
Kendri has benefitted not only him,
but the other members of his family
as well. He says, “Being educated
about another culture and history
is invigorating for me and for my
family.”
Finally, Amelia feels that, “There
are always benefits from being with
someone who is different than you.
You get to experience a new culture,
new languages, new traditions, new
food. You get a broader sense of the
world and those around you.”
Any relationship that gives you
such a deep appreciation of others
seems worth the effort involved in
overcoming all the differences, those
we all share and those specific to
intercultural couples.
February 2013
57