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When a boy experiences his frst wet dream, it might cause distress and shame; he may think that he has wet himself ! It’s important to reassure him that this is normal. It may be helpful to explain what has happened, why, and that all his friends will encounter the same thing at some point.

The day will come where your son feels the urge to masturbate as part of the exploration of his changing body. It’s important that you talk to him about this and that he learns that masturbating is normal and not harmful.

Social standing

Self-awareness and image are at the forefront of a teenager’s mind. Therefore, physical or noticeable changes often have the greatest impact on their self-image. Teenage boys are often frustrated when their voices start to crack – part of the problem is that they can’t control it and don’t know when it will crack and for how long. Dads: If you can tell your son stories of when you went through the same experience, it will let him know it’s normal, and will reinforce that he will ultimately have a voice like yours that’s much deeper and manlier.

Spots, pimples, acne and any other names you might call them are the bane of most teenagers. However, unlike when many of us were kids, there are now multitudes of products and treatments available to effectively treat this condition. Regular hygiene should be encouraged, but, like oily hair, it’s part of the process of puberty that some adolescents experience due to hormonal changes. It’s important to clarify that the cause of acne is not

due to a poor diet (e.g, eating chocolate or fast food) or poor hygiene (although you may be tempted to use both examples as a way to deter these behaviours!). Reinforcing that this is most likely a temporary condition may help ease the stress.

These body changes can embarrass some preteens and teens, and they can become concerned that they are not developing as quickly (or as slowly) as their friends. Explain to your son that boys’ and girls’ bodies will change at different rates, and that comparisons are not helpful, as they are simply different people. Your son will have a different type of body from his friends, just as he will have different strengths and weaknesses at school or in sports. When embarking on this discussion with your son, it’s often best that you have low expectations regarding his contribution. He is likely to provide you with well-practiced, monosyllabic responses such as “yeah”, “I don’t know”, or “I don’t care”. But try not to get discouraged: hearing your advice is likely to bring him huge relief and he will almost defnitely listen to everything you say (although he might not let you know it).

Talking about your personal experiences at his age may go some way to normalising the whole experience for your son, especially how you coped with the adjustment to your new body. Obviously, do not tease your son about his pubertal changes, especially the cracking voice. The most important message you can give as a parent is that you are open to listening, anytime. This alone can help him work towards fostering a positive body image and open the doors to further communication.

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