is like to be someone who has AS.
For example, act out a situation
where you’re doing your homework,
Skyping a friend and your mum is
trying to have a conversation with
you, and ask students to explain how
it would feel to have the same sensory
overload most of the time. Helping
neuro-typical children recognise these
differences helps them understand
their AS peers better.
The real world
While you might be daunted by a
diagnosis of Asperger’s in your child,
there’s no reason to lose hope. Your
child, like any child, will grow and
develop in his own way. And an AS
diagnosis is no reason to fear that your
child will fail to achieve a successful
career and fulfilling life.
“A person with Asperger’s
syndrome or autism has to
compensate for poor social skills
by making themselves so good in
a specialised field that individuals
will be willing to ‘buy’ their skill
even though social skills are poor,”
wrote Temple Grandin, in a response
published on the Autism Research
Institute site in 1999. “Choose jobs
that put low demands on short-term
working memory (cashier, market
trader, air traffic controller) and
utilise an excellent long-term memory
(computer programming, quality
control, accounting).”
Robert, the marine biologist,
was happiest when he spent time
in the Maldives researching and
cataloguing marine life for a local
lab, but shunned the pressure and
Relationships and sexuality
Despite the difficulties AS adolescents encounter in communicating and interacting socially, and their emotional
maturity being behind their peer group, their interest in sexuality is similar to adolescents their own age. People with
Asperger’s understand the theoretical need for a prom date and the desire for sex, but they don’t understand the
love or intimacy needed to sustain a relationship.
“Parents need to give a detailed and concrete description of sexual acts and intimate areas. By ignoring the
discussion, we make them vulnerable to abuse or displays of inappropriate sexual behaviour. Since they can’t read
facial cues or understand intentions, they can be easy victims of date rape or cyber-predators,” says Dr Isabelle
Hénault, author of
Asperger’s Syndrome and Sexuality
. She adds, “Adolescents with ASD process information literally,
making online pornography the perfect trap. It sets inaccurate guidelines for consensual sex or protection during
intercourse.”
Flirting and dating are particularly complicated, with masked cues that leave them frustrated. Dr Hénault
works with adolescents to identify the qualities of a healthy relationship and to recognise and prevent abusive or
dangerous ones. She suggests role-playing so as to decode body language and social cues they may encounter in
real-life situations.
Seeking support
Check out these organisations in Hong Kong that offer support to families dealing with autism spectrum disorders:
responsibility of guiding guests in
underwater dives. He adds, “It’s
important to funnel your interest
into something you are happy with,
but take the time to understand its
application in the real world.”
Whether your child has AS or
not, you play an important role in
coaching and encouraging him.
While he might not follow in every
one of your footsteps, your child with
AS can achieve great things, in his
own way.
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