A
s any expat knows, one of
the great joys of travelling
is discovering new and
exciting destinations
and immersing yourself in the local
culture. But even better than just
exploring new sites is sharing the
experience with someone you love.
Most of your great adventures include
your spouse and your kids, and
maybe even some friends, but before
finalising your plans, take a moment
to consider inviting your parents.
If your parents are elderly, I know
that might sound crazy. When I tell
people how much I’ve travelled with
my mum (300,000+ miles so far, and
counting!), I usually hear a shocked
response along the lines of, “How
could you spend that much time
with your mum?” Even people who
get along great with their parents
are often aghast at the thought of
travelling with them.
Now, I won’t kid you: travelling
with a parent can be difficult. After
all, they’re still your parents and my
mother
still
knows how to push my
buttons (and I know how to push hers)!
That said, travelling with a parent can
be magical. And, who knows: perhaps
you’ll finally let go of the parent-
child trappings and actually become
friends.
But, to make this work, you’re
going to have to do a bit of planning.
Here are my best tips to help you get
the most from your experience when
you travel with an ageing parent.
Understand that your parents’
input matters.
When you travel solo, holidays are
opportunities to be completely self-
absorbed and do only what you want
to do. When you travel with kids, you
shift your expectations, including
activities that will engage them and
allowing extra time for the inevitable
mishaps you’ll encounter. When you
travel with an older parent, you’ll
have to adjust your outlook again.
When you’re evaluating holiday
destinations or planning activities,
remind yourself that a holiday with
your parents is
not
just about you;
instead, it’s something you’re sharing
together
. You owe it to Mum and Dad
to ensure that they’re comfortable and
happy when you’re travelling together,
and that you’re not suffocating them
into submission.
Their input matters
. If it
doesn’t, then you shouldn’t take them
on the trip.
Ask them what
they
want to do and
then incorporate their ideas into the
plan. Valuing their contributions is
another way to show your love for
them.
Know your parents’ medical
and physical conditions.
Going on holiday is a great
opportunity to see first-hand how
your parent is functioning with basic
life skills. They may say they are fine
when you call, but being with them
for an extended period of time will
December 2014
107