I
s it safe to keep “doing it”? We get that
question about sex during pregnancy
quite often at Annerley. The good
news is that, if your pregnancy is
normal and your waters haven’t broken,
having sex during pregnancy is perfectly
safe. Having intercourse cannot hurt
or “dent” the baby, since she is well-
protected and cushioned by amniotic
fluid. Moreover, the mucus plug that sits
inside the cervix provides protection
against infection.
We do, however, recommend
avoiding penetrative sex (but not
intimacy!) if there is an existing
pregnancy-related complication such as:
• a low-lying placenta
• premature labour (i.e. labour started
before 37 weeks)
• vaginal bleeding
• abnormal vaginal discharge
• incompetent cervix or cervical
insufficiency
• ruptured membranes or broken waters
• an outbreak of genital herpes or
feeling one coming on
• existence of sexually transmitted
diseases
But being “allowed” to do it doesn’t
necessarily mean you’ll both be up for it,
which varies from person to person and
from one stage of the pregnancy to the
next. Friends of mine, pregnant with twins,
couldn’t have put it more poetically
when they described having sex one
week as “loving the lotus”, and the next
as “humping the hippo”.
What’s happening?
From a physiological perspective,
there are a number of changes
that may contribute to the ebbing
and flowing of your sex drive. For
most women, increased blood flow
causes engorgement of the breasts
and genitals. For some, that results in
heightened sensitivity; for others, it results
in feeling “full” and uncomfortable.
Vaginal secretions are more likely to
increase and smell stronger, which, for
some, will add to pleasure, but for others
may be off-putting.
A pregnant woman’s libido is most
likely to decrease during the first trimester
because of the vast internal changes
the body is going through. Feeling tired,
moody, nauseous and/or sick, along with
breasts that feel too tender to touch are
common contributors to a decreased
sex drive. Psychologically, even though
we know that sex during pregnancy
is safe, some women might still feel
anxious about the possibility of causing a
miscarriage.
The second trimester is commonly
known as the honeymoon period. Many
women – but certainly not all – will feel
more energetic and generally sexier, with
glowing skin, shiny hair and new-found
curves. For some though, the feelings
of tiredness and nausea continue well
into this stage. As the second trimester
progresses, partners are more likely to
worry about hurting the baby, since the
pregnancy starts to become more and
more visible and “real” to them.
During the third trimester, for the
majority of pregnant women, sex just
isn’t at the top of the priority list as
At some point, every expectant parent wonders
what will happen to their sex life. Midwife
Sofie
Jacobs
has the low-down.
Let’s get
tiredness and niggles, such as backache,
swollen ankles and heartburn, take over.
For partners, the third trimester may
bring worries and anxieties about the
upcoming labour, birth and life after
baby arrives.
What can we do?
Keeping the lines of communication
with your partner open will help to avoid
unnecessary mix-ups. Let your partner
know if you’re not feeling turned on or
if something feels uncomfortable. What
felt great yesterday may not feel all
that good today. You might want to try
something different and experiment
with different positions, foreplay or
self-pleasure. If this is still too much, a
generous dose of stroking, hugging and
kissing will go a long way!
If you are still having sex, it is
common – especially in the third
trimester – to feel mild cramps during
and/or after, especially if you orgasm.
These cramps are Braxton Hicks
contractions that are caused by the
release of oxytocin. They are absolutely
harmless and not an indication for you to
stop.
This brings me to another common
question: Can sex induce labour? The
answer, I’m afraid, isn’t clear. For years,
many doctors and midwives have been
advising pregnant couples to have sex to
help get labour going, rather than having
to induce. This is based on the theory that:
• Sex increases the release of oxytocin,
especially during orgasm, and
oxytocin controls uterine contractions.
• Semen contains a high concentration
of prostaglandins, which are known to
help soften the cervix.
It seems that sometimes this works,
but sometimes it doesn’t. I say, if it doesn’t
hurt, it’s worth a try!
physical
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